"My name is Tim and I'm a TVholic. It's been 3 1/2 years since I last viewed TV." (Roar of applause from the crowd)
My wife and I made a decision for our family several years ago. We decided that we needed to give something up as a family for Lent. We talked about giving up sweets as a family, giving up snacks between meals, and giving up video games (great idea, but not everyone in the family played video games, so that one wouldn't work). We ultimately decided to give up TV for Lent. Forty days with no television. At the time it seemed like a daunting task. Could we do it? We thought so. We would hold each other accountable and promise to not turn the television on. And we succeeded! We made it 40 days with absolutely no television. Then another question emerged as we entered Easter season. Do we turn the TV back on? We decided not to, so we canceled our cable subscription. Money was tight anyway (isn't it always?) and we could use the few extra bucks a month it cost for more worthy causes, like food!
And so for nearly 4 years now we have been virtually TV free now. We occasionally turned the TV on to watch American Idol or a baseball game through the fuzzy reception our antennae gave us, but now with the conversion to digital we've gone completely dark (no digital ready TV set in my house). From time to time someone will ask me if I saw a particular news program or television show. I always answer, "No, we don't watch TV at my house." I get a range of reactions from looks that say "you're nuts!" to "I could never do that!" (You are probably having a similar reaction right now!)
You know what, I don't miss it. Not one bit! I never noticed before, but I was addicted to television. I became addicted to TV as a child. I realize this now when I sing a jingle from a commercial or talk about a show from my childhood and my wife has no idea what I'm talking about. We grew up in the same generation, but apparently she did not watch nearly as much television as I did.
I also realize now how much of a negative impact the television had on my marriage and family. The TV use to be continually on in my house, at least when I was home. I rarely got on the floor and wrestled with my children. I rarely read to them, or had them read to me. I barely ever interacted with them. "Couple time" with me and my wife consisted of putting the kids to bed, watching the news, Leno or Letterman, and then Conan O'Brien (we've always been night owls).
Our family life is dramatically different now. Sure, there are still times when I dismiss my kids when they ask me to play with them or read to them, but I'm much more likely to take time to spend with them now. I actually enjoy spending time with my kids, wrestling with them or playing board games. My marriage has improved. Now, instead of turning on the television when we put the kids down, my wife and I actually talk to each other! And you know what, I keep rediscovering why I fell in love with her! Eliminating my addiction to television has improved my life, my marriage, and my family.
I want to challenge you. Take a break from your television as a family. Don't just do it for a day, or for a week. Turn it off for a whole month! And don't wait until Lent to start. Start today. I guarantee you will see a difference in your family and your marriage. Then come back after a month and leave a comment on what difference it has made.
4 comments:
While I applaud you and your family, what you have done is a healthy thing,
I do want to ask this question:
if not for you and yours, perhaps for someone else(s)-
How many computers do you have?
How much time do you (and yours) spend BURIED in this electronic world, ALONE?
As wondeful as the www is, once again we need to ask -
are our computers becoming our God?
That's a question many have pondered about TV.
And many families have gone to one household TV
one household computers
and limited time with both.
God be with you
Ahhh....The dreaded computer. To answer your question, we have 1 family computer. Don't have a need for more, nor do I see a need for more, even with five kids.
Yes, my wife and I feel a pull to spend more time surfing the net than spending time with each other. But we are both aware of this and make a conscious effort to not get pulled in. Sometimes we succeed, other times we fail.
However, the internet has never been as much an issue with me as the TV was. Television seemed to suck the life out of me and hours would pass without my realizing it. The computer does not have that much of a draw for me, unless I get involved in one of my games--which I try to stay away from these days.
You make a good point. The computer and internet can be as destructive to a marriage and family (if not more so) than the television. We need to temper our time online as we do zoning out in front of the TV.
Tim-
Saw your post on Catholic Dads. I completely agree on removing the TV from family life. We do not even own one, which is more the result of not wanting to move it to our current house. It was the heaviest thing in our house (pre-flat screen days) and so rather than moving it, we sold it. That was almost a year and a half ago.
Before then, we did not watch too much TV. I watched my fall football games and my wife watched the occasional show during the day while she was home with our daughter. But we never had cable, so the choices were limited off the bat.
I'm in law school now, so my ability to sit back and watch a TV show is limited by the time I have to put into reading in the evenings. (Let's leave a discussion of workaholism for another day.) My wife has found a love for reading that she did not have all through undergrad at FUS and throughout grad school.
Now when we are at a house that has cable and see how it sucks people in, we are so glad we do not have one. Granted, there are times we'd like to sit and watch a show together, but we have found that avoiding TV is a giant leap in the direction of having more time together and a better marriage as a result.
Thanks for the post.
Aaron
There is a movement to get Tv in third world countries... because the governments believe that they will have less babies. Fewer babies usually means a higher divorce rate too. We have TV, but we limit it... my daughter is allowed 1 half hour show a day. TV can be a blessing or a curse, I hope that people can use the good aspects in moderation to enrich their lives without falling prey to the couch potato virus. Internet can be the same, I know lots of internet junkies who just need to unplug and get outside!
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