Break Time!

The past several weeks of my life have been pretty crazy. Not only do I work a part-time job in addition to my full time job as a youth minister, but my ministry job has been seemingly non-stop for the past month or so. Between Confirmation, graduation Mass, meetings (more than usual!), coordinating the Matthew Kelly speaking event at my parish (see www.dynamiccatholic.com or www.matthewkelly.org for more about Matthew), I have barely had time to breathe, much less do anything else. And then Memorial Day weekend came. A time to slow down, relax, and spend time with family. Yet, this weekend was anything but slow.

Friday night was the start of it all. It was the night Matthew came to speak. This is something I have been anticipating and preparing for for months. I've been wanting to get him to come ever since I read his book, Rediscovering Catholicism. If you haven't read this book, you need to!  Matthew's message is one that needs to be heard in parishes across the U.S. It was an amazing event. It was spiritually refreshing and good to hear his message. Unfortunately, I did not take the time to allow it to sink in. This weekend was the peak of busyness in my busy month. It was spent either working in the yard or working my part-time job.

In the midst of the craziness of my life, I've forgotten several things. First of all, I've forgotten to pray...or rather I've chosen to not take the time to pray. I thought about prayer often, but rarely did I stop to spend time in prayer with my Lord. I didn't pick up my Bible. I didn't read any other spiritual book. I consumed myself with distractions, telling myself I'll get to prayer later. As a result of neglecting to maintain my relationship with God, I have forgotten to maintain and nurture my relationship with my wife and children. The result of all of this has not been pretty. I've lost sight of my passion and purpose in life.

 Summer break is here. I'm done with my weekly youth group meetings until September. I'm still meeting with the teens this summer, but I'm taking a much needed 3 week break. And when I do start meeting with them over the summer, it is going to be much less intense than during the school year. I need to take this short break to regroup and refocus. Matthew said on Friday night that our lives change when our habits change. I need to change my habits. I need to make a habit of nurturing my relationship with God. I need to spend time with Him every day. I need to make a habit of nurturing my relationship with my spouse and my children. I need to slow down the pace of my life and focus on what is really important: My God and my family.

What about you? Do you need to slow down? Do you need to refocus? Do you need to change your habits? Do you need to change your life? Take time out today to think about these questions. Think about where your focus is. Is that focus going to lead you to heaven, or is it just keeping you busy in the moment? I know that my focus has been keeping me busy, but has not been leading me to heaven. Make the changes in your habits that are necessary to change your life. Find good habits to replace the bad ones. Start by making prayer a habit. Start today. I am.

Life Is Habit Forming

You all have heard the phrase "You are what you eat." When I was a small child, I didn't understand what that meant. As all children do, I took it literally. How could I, or anyone for that matter, become a chocolate doughnut? It seemed ridiculous, and I didn't understand what adults meant when they said it. As an adult, with a more abstract view on life, I have come to understand that if you don't eat healthy then you won't be healthy. If all I ate was chocolate doughnuts then I would be overweight and unhealthy. I guess I would kind of take the shape of a doughnut, but I wouldn't become one.

Just as you become what you eat, your habits form who you are. Your habits form your present, they predict your future. Before the beginning of Lent, I challenged the teens in my youth group to give up one of their bad habits during Lent. Prior to the meeting, I had no intention of discussing this with the teens. I wasn't even going to talk about Lent. I was going in a different direction. But at the last minute, I felt that I needed to add more to my meeting to fill up time. So I threw in a discussion on Lent at the end of the meeting. And, as a part of that discussion, I suggested they give up a bad habit during Lent.

The Holy Spirit must have been at work, because I've encountered the subject of habits several times since that meeting. This has made me reflect on the habits I have in my life. Yes, I do have some good habits. I read every day, and much of that reading is spiritual in nature. I may not make it into Church every day to spend time in silence with the Lord, but I do pray every day. I've also got some bad habits. I won't air my dirty laundry to the world, but my bad habits center around laziness and allowing myself to be too easily distracted with unnecessary leisure pursuits. I'm beginning to see that those bad habits that I have are in direct opposition to and compete with the good habits I have. Oftentimes, those bad habits win out. My laziness and distracted mind keeps me from spending the time I should be spending reading and praying.

I do notice a difference in my attitude based on which habits win the battle in my mind. If I allow the bad habits to win the battle, then I'm impatient and unsettled. I have no peace in my life. I am, oftentimes, filled with guilt in doing that which I should not do. Yet, as they are habits, I keep doing them. When I am successful in pushing the bad habits aside and take the time to spend with the Lord in spiritual reading and quiet reflection, then I have peace. I feel much better about myself and my life. I am a happier person when my good habits prevail.

I am going to spend this Lent, and beyond, changing my habits, one at a time. I am going to rid myself of my bad habits, and I am going to replace them with good habits. I like the way I feel when I have good habits. I want to keep feeling that way. I want a happy, peaceful present. I want a happy, peaceful, future. And I am going to start with asking the question, with every decision I make, "God, what do you think I should do?"