Sacrificial Love

In my work as a youth minister, I come across some pretty deep and theological things. As I was doing some prep work today for a future meeting, I came across this quote from Pope John Paul II:

Love is not merely a feeling. It is an act of the will that consists of preferring in a constant manner the good of others to the good of oneself.

Wow! What a convicting statement! If I am to love others I then need to prefer the good of others over myself. I need to be willing to sacrifice myself, to let go of my desires, and to give to others without question. I love my wife, I love my children, I love my extended family and friends, but do I really and truly prefer their good over mine? Unfortunately the answer to that is, oftentimes, no.

Reflecting on this brings to mind last Sunday's Gospel reading from Mark where the rich young man wants to know what it takes to inherit eternal life. Jesus' answer to him was to "Go, sell what you have, and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me." (Mark 10:21). Taken at the surface, this passage is telling us to give up all of our earthly attachments, to sacrifice earthly wealth and possessions. But taking this passage deeper, we get to the heart of what Christ is calling us to--and that calling is to love.

We need to be willing to do more than just give up our earthly possessions for others. What Christ is calling us to do is to prefer the will of others over our own wills. Preferring the will of others changes the dynamic; it changes our attitude toward sacrifice. Just giving up our will for others involves an attitude of sacrifice. There is nothing wrong with sacrifice. In fact, sacrifice is necessary and important. It's our attitude about sacrifice that needs to change. Giving up our will has negative connotations, which makes sacrifice more difficult for us to do.

However, if we prefer the will of others over our own, then sacrifice becomes much easier. If we prefer to give our money to the poor rather than buying a fancy new entertainment system, then the decision to sacrifice our wills is much easier. Christ wasn't telling the rich young man to give up all his wealth because there was some poor person that needed his money. He was telling the rich young man how to love--that is, he was telling the rich young man that he needed to prefer the will of others over his own.

Christ himself preferred the will of others over his own. He paid the ultimate sacrifice for all of us through his crucifixion. Christ, in his humanness, didn't want to die, but he understood love. And that love required his death in order for us to have life. I hope and pray that someday (soon!) I may be able to understand love like Christ does.