Life Is Habit Forming

You all have heard the phrase "You are what you eat." When I was a small child, I didn't understand what that meant. As all children do, I took it literally. How could I, or anyone for that matter, become a chocolate doughnut? It seemed ridiculous, and I didn't understand what adults meant when they said it. As an adult, with a more abstract view on life, I have come to understand that if you don't eat healthy then you won't be healthy. If all I ate was chocolate doughnuts then I would be overweight and unhealthy. I guess I would kind of take the shape of a doughnut, but I wouldn't become one.

Just as you become what you eat, your habits form who you are. Your habits form your present, they predict your future. Before the beginning of Lent, I challenged the teens in my youth group to give up one of their bad habits during Lent. Prior to the meeting, I had no intention of discussing this with the teens. I wasn't even going to talk about Lent. I was going in a different direction. But at the last minute, I felt that I needed to add more to my meeting to fill up time. So I threw in a discussion on Lent at the end of the meeting. And, as a part of that discussion, I suggested they give up a bad habit during Lent.

The Holy Spirit must have been at work, because I've encountered the subject of habits several times since that meeting. This has made me reflect on the habits I have in my life. Yes, I do have some good habits. I read every day, and much of that reading is spiritual in nature. I may not make it into Church every day to spend time in silence with the Lord, but I do pray every day. I've also got some bad habits. I won't air my dirty laundry to the world, but my bad habits center around laziness and allowing myself to be too easily distracted with unnecessary leisure pursuits. I'm beginning to see that those bad habits that I have are in direct opposition to and compete with the good habits I have. Oftentimes, those bad habits win out. My laziness and distracted mind keeps me from spending the time I should be spending reading and praying.

I do notice a difference in my attitude based on which habits win the battle in my mind. If I allow the bad habits to win the battle, then I'm impatient and unsettled. I have no peace in my life. I am, oftentimes, filled with guilt in doing that which I should not do. Yet, as they are habits, I keep doing them. When I am successful in pushing the bad habits aside and take the time to spend with the Lord in spiritual reading and quiet reflection, then I have peace. I feel much better about myself and my life. I am a happier person when my good habits prevail.

I am going to spend this Lent, and beyond, changing my habits, one at a time. I am going to rid myself of my bad habits, and I am going to replace them with good habits. I like the way I feel when I have good habits. I want to keep feeling that way. I want a happy, peaceful present. I want a happy, peaceful, future. And I am going to start with asking the question, with every decision I make, "God, what do you think I should do?"

The Baby Gianna Story

Please take the time to read the story of Baby Gianna, being featured on the Creative Minority Report blog. It is not just a story of one mother who chose life, but it is also an expose on Catholic hospitals that offer abortion to their patients. It is an important story, and one we all, as Catholics, need to be aware of. The link to part 1 is below. Links to the rest of the story are on the blog.

Creative Minority Report: The Baby Gianna Story Part 1

We All Desire Holiness

You have within you a desire to be holy.  Whether you realize it or not, it's there. We all, whether Christian, Jew, Muslim, atheist, or agnostic, have within us a desire to be holy. It is written into our soul. It is a part of who we are, a part of how God created us.

What is holiness? Quite simply, holiness is "an insatiable desire to improve oneself and an unquenchable concern for unholy people" (Matthew Kelly). We all want to improve our lives and the lives of others. This is holiness. Unfortunately, we often follow that desire for holiness down the wrong paths. We seek holiness in the world. We seek it in improving our social status. We seek it in improving our economic status. We think that money and status will improve ourselves. We think that we will be happy only if we have enough money and enough friends. But are we really happy? Are we really improving ourselves by having more money or respect in business and society? Maybe, but does the pursuit of wealth and status lead to lasting happiness or self-improvement? No, because once we reach the goal we set for ourselves we ultimately find that it is not enough, and we seek more.

Many people think that in order to be holy you are not allowed to enjoy life. Some people believe that to be holy you have to run away from the world, or that you have to be in a church on your knees all day. All of these are unnatural responses to what holiness is. I say unnatural because there is nothing more natural than being holy. What is unnatural is our worldly pursuit of holiness.

What is holiness? Holiness is a choice. It is choosing what God wants for you and letting go of what you want for yourself. In order to truly improve ourselves, we must learn to let go of what we want. We must, in order to be truly holy, have an insatiable desire to do what God wants us to do. We must allow God to guide our thoughts, our words, our actions. It is only through doing this that we will have an insatiable desire to improve ourselves. It is only in following God's plan for our lives that we can have an unquenchable concern for unholy people. If we can do this, if we can give complete control over to God, then we can fulfill our desire for holiness.

Unanswered Prayers?

I have many unanswered prayers in my life....or at least they seem unanswered to me. I read this today about unanswered prayers. It is  from a document found on the body of an unidentified Confederate soldier during the Civil War:

I asked for strength that I might achieve; I was left weak that I might learn to humbly obey.

I asked for power that I might lead, and win the praise of men; I was given weakness that I might feel the need for God.

I asked for health that I might do great things; I was given infirmity that I might do better things.

I got nothing I asked for, but everything I hoped for. Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered. I am among all men most richly blessed.

I'm Making Some Radical Changes!

I need to make some radical changes in my life. I need to be less selfish, lazy, and unfocused. I need more discipline in all aspects of my life: spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, and physically. I feel like I've been saying this for years, however I don't think I've ever really taken myself and my need to change seriously. If I had, I would have done it, right?

So, yes, I need to make some radical changes...changes in the way I live my life, but also changes in my attitude. I need to start taking seriously my need to change. I've heard that it takes 4-6 weeks to break bad habits and create new ones. With Lent starting in less than two weeks, its time I start taking my need to change seriously and to create new, good habits to replace the old, bad habits I currently have. So here's what I'm going to do:

1. Prayer. Duh! I should be doing this anyway, but you know what...I haven't been praying as consistently as I should. I work for a church, so I am committing to get in front of the Blessed Sacrament every work day to spend some time with Our Lord. It should seem easy, right? I've tried this before, but I've been inconsistent. I haven't been taking it seriously enough. I need to believe that there is nothing more important than prayer, that prayer is to the soul what water is to the body. I can't survive without it. I'm going to schedule prayer into my day, and I am going to stick to my commitment.
2. Fasting. I wrote a blog post on the importance fasting just last week. I also committed to fast every Friday. Well, here I am barely a week into it, and I've already failed. Again, I'm not taking it seriously.I need to understand and believe that fasting is good not only for my body, but also for my soul. I need to be willing to make small sacrifices in order to purify my soul. And I need to do it with a spirit of prayer, and not out of a sense of obligation.
3. Spiritual Reading. I love to read! I always have. It's part of the reason why I obtained a bachelor's degree in literature. I need to spend time every day reading something spiritual. I need to expand my mind spiritually and intellectually and am committing to read every day during Lent. I plan on reading The Gargoyle Code by Fr. Dwight Longenecker. I'm really excited about this book and the spiritual growth I hope to gain from it. If you don't know who Fr. Longenecker is, check out his blog, Standing on My Head.
4. Discipline. I will remain focused and disciplined at work and at home. I will not allow distractions to keep me from doing the important work in my family, on the job, and in the above three goals for Lent. To help with that goal, I am going to stay away from Facebook and twitter throughout the course of Lent. I have set up my blog to automatically post new articles to those sites to keep my friends, family, and followers informed.

I know that I am committing to a lot this Lent. Some may say that I am taking on too much. Maybe I am. But radical change calls for radical action. This is all stuff I should be doing anyway, and Lent poses the perfect opportunity to get my life back on track spiritually, physically, intellectually, and emotionally.

What are you doing for Lent?

Justice Will Be Served

Have you ever gone to a parent to ask for something and they said no? Have you ever made a request of your boss and had that request rejected? What did you do? Did you give up and walk away, or did you keep asking? Chances are, if it was important, if it meant a lot to you, you kept asking. You didn't give up. You persisted until you got them to listen to you and the reasons for your request.

This is what the persistent widow did in the gospels (Luke 18:1-8). Here we have this old widow who needs some justice, so she goes to the judge. He rejects her request for justice. But her request is really important, so she keeps asking. She doesn't give up.

I know when I was a child, whenever my parents rejected a request of mine, I thought they were being unjust. I thought it was unfair that they did not give me what I wanted....that they wouldn't even listen to my argument about why I needed what I was asking for. I, unfortunately, was not a very persistent child, so I normally just dropped the request after my first attempt. Had I persisted, my parents may have at least listened to my argument, and they may have even granted my request.

We all make requests of God in our prayer. It is often my experience that God does not grant my prayer requests...at least not initially. I have, from time to time, seen God as being unjust for not granting my request, for not listening to my arguments. But I continue to be persistent in the hopes that God will eventually listen to and answer my prayers, because I know that God is a just judge.Think about it, if an unjust judge, like in the parable of the persistent widow, will eventually hear and respond to the pleas, helpless widow, how much more will God, who is just, respond to our pleas.

However, take note! The bible passage never indicates that the judge gave the decision that the widow was looking for.  All he agrees to do is to "deliver a just decision for her." The widow does not necessarily receive what she wants, but she does receive justice.

Likewise, through persistent prayer, God will eventually hear our pleas, our cries for help. And, like the judge, he won't necessarily give us what we want. But he will  give us what we need, what is best for us. God will deliver justice.

Are You Judas or Peter?

You are one or the other. We all are either Judas or Peter. Judas betrayed his Savior. Peter denied Him. They both fell from grace. They both sinned. We are not either Judas or Peter in how we sin. Lord knows, I have both betrayed and denied our Savior. We are either Judas or Peter in how we react after our betrayal or denial.

Let's take a look at Judas first:

Then Judas, his betrayer, seeing that Jesus had been condemned, deeply regretted what he had done. He returned the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders, saying, "I have sinned in betraying innocent blood."...Flinging the money into the temple, he departed and went off and hanged himself. (Matthew 27:3-5)

 Judas handed over his Savior to be crucified. How many times have we done that ourselves? Each time we sin, each time we willfully hurt another, we crucify Christ. As soon as Judas handed Jesus over, he realized the error of his ways. I know that oftentimes when I sin, I immediately recognize the error of my ways. But, how did Judas react to the recognition of sin? Judas' life had become so depraved that he could not see that Jesus still loved him, despite what he had done. You see, God's love is perfect and unchanging. God continues to love us no matter how far we stray from Him, no matter what we do. Judas did not see this. He felt that his sins were so bad that God couldn't love him anymore. His despair was so deep that the only option he saw was death. Judas completely rejected Christ and His love by hanging himself.

Now we move on to Peter:

He began to curse and to swear, "I do not know this man about whom you are talking." And immediately a cock crowed a second time. Then Peter remembered the word that Jesus had said to him, "Before the cock crows twice you will deny me three times." He broke down and wept. (Mark 14:71-72)

Peter denied Christ. How often do we deny Christ? Each time we do not stand up for our faith or our beliefs, we are denying Christ.  Each time we fail to defend our Christian values, we deny Christ. Peter's reaction to his own sin is vastly different from Judas'. Peter, unlike Judas, knew that Jesus still loved him despite his sin. Peter was deeply saddened by his own sinfulness, but he did not despair. He knew that God's grace was present. He knew the love of the Father.

Who are you? Are you deep into sin and despairing, like Judas? Have you lost sight of the fact that God loves you, that He will continue to love you? Is your sin causing you to fall deeper into sin, like Judas?

Or, are you like Peter? Do you pick yourself back up after you fall, knowing that God loves you? Do you allow the forgiving grace and love of the Father wash over you?

The bottom line is this: We all betray Christ. We all deny Him. But we all must realize that God's love for us is unchanging. God loves us no matter how much we sin. God loves us no matter how far we wander from Him. We need to be sorry for falling. We need to pick ourselves back up after we fall and ask God for forgiveness. We need to be Peter.