Over-eating. Shopping malls. Toy stores. Waiting in long lines to get the great deal. Wading through busy stores. Surfing the net to find the best price. What did you do this holiday weekend? Did you eat too much on Thursday and then spend too much the rest of the weekend? Me? Yeah, I probably ate too much on Thursday, but I didn't do any shopping. After working in retail for 12 years I hate the idea of going anywhere near a store the weekend after Thanksgiving. But millions of people nationwide went out shopping this weekend for Black Friday "deals". There were lines of people outside of toy stores and electronic stores just to save a couple of bucks. (The not-so secret industry plan is to get you into the store to save a couple of dollars on 1 item just to gouge you on other items that you buy while you are there, so are you really saving any money? The only real way to save money is to not spend it. I know, working in the industry has made me cynical....but I digress.)
I spent the weekend before Thanksgiving doing something I had never done before. I spent the weekend homeless. Yes, you heard correctly, I was "homeless" for about 18 hours. I took 8 teenagers on a homeless retreat at a parish in my diocese. This retreat is designed to heighten the awareness of homelessness to the teenagers and to simulate homelessness. They were allowed to bring only 3 items with them--and no electronics which meant...no cell phones. If you spend any time with teens these days you know that they never go anywhere without their cell phones. Many teens brought tarps to sleep on and sleeping bags. Some teens brought cardboard boxes to sleep in. In all, about 140 teens from 10 parishes in our diocese attended the retreat. The retreat was even featured on a local news station. You can read the story and watch the video here.
It was a truly moving experience that started with Mass, talks, and Eucharistic Adoration. We were served dinner of a cup of soup, 2 crackers, and lemonade. Then the teens (and us adults) spent the night sleeping outside. It was chilly, but not cold. (Thank God we live in Florida!) Everything got wet from the dew. On Sunday morning, we got up at about 5:30, cleaned up our "campsites", and had a breakfast of 1 danish and a choice of either a cup of juice or hot chocolate.
The most moving experience for me for the whole weekend was going to Pinellas Hope. Pinellas Hope is a program of Catholic Charities in the Diocese of St. Petersburg. To give a brief summary, Pinellas Hope is also known as "Tent City". It is not a traditional homeless shelter. When the homeless arrive, they are first assigned to a tent that they can sleep in. After they get a job they can move into a "house". It is a small shack built of wood about the size of a typical home's bathroom. The newest addition to Pinellas Hope (not yet in use) is 80 transitional efficiency apartments where the homeless can move into and pay rent on. The whole mission of Pinellas Hope is to help the homeless get back on their feet and in a home and job of their own. You can read more details on their website.
What was most moving to me in going to Pinellas Hope was not seeing the homeless and the conditions they live in. It was not seeing the teens serve breakfast to the homeless. What was most moving to me was watching the teens, after serving breakfast, sit down with them and interact with the homeless. This is way outside the comfort zones of many teens. Heck....its outside my comfort zone. It was truly a moving experience because I firmly believe that you cannot solve the issues of poverty and homelessness if you keep them at arms length by writing a check or dropping food off at a food bank. (Yes, these things are necessary, but to truly break the cycle of poverty in someone's life people to get closer, to interact, to help heal some of the issues that are at the root of poverty.)
All of this brings me to the topic of this post and the last of the 7 Deadly Sins--Greed. How much did you spend this past weekend? $50? $100? $500? $1000 or more? I work part-time for a television and internet retailer answering phones and placing orders for customers. I had quite a few customers drop $500 and even $1000 on one transaction with me, and who knows how much they spent elsewhere.
What is greed? Is having wealth considered greedy? No. There is nothing wrong with having wealth. There is nothing wrong with making lots of money. God gives each of us gifts.One gift that God gives certain people is the gift of wealth. However, as in all the gifts that God gives us, He asks that we use those gifts to give Him greater glory.
Am I saying that if you spent a small fortune over the weekend that you are greedy? Certainly not, although you may be. Greed is when we take the gifts that God gives us and use them solely for our own benefit. Greed occurs when we make money, and the pursuit of it, the primary focus in our lives--when we make money and possessions our god.
So, what are we to do? Many of us have been given many blessings, financial and otherwise. I may not make much money (I have two jobs and still barely pay the bills), but I have been blessed financially because I can pay the bills. I have a roof over my head and 3 meals every day. I am in a much better financial position than those who are homeless. The first thing we need to do is be grateful for what we have. Above that, we need to be like the poor widow from Luke 21: "When he looked up he saw some wealthy people putting their offerings into the treasury and he noticed a poor widow putting in two small coins. He said, 'I tell you truly, this poor widow put in more than all the rest; for those others have made offerings from their surplus wealth, but she, from her poverty, had offered her whole livelihood." (Luke 21:1-4)
We...I....need to be like the poor widow. I'm not like her. I may not be wealthy by the standards of the U.S., but I am wealthy by the standards of the world. There are those that are less fortunate than me in third world countries, and even in my own back yard. I give only from my surplus. I need to offer my whole livelihood. I need to give until it hurts. I need to give what I can financially, and then go out "into the fields" and help those in need. I need, we all need, to be instruments of Christ to those in need--to help them out of poverty, out of pain, out of suffering, not from a distance keeping them at arms length, but face to face as the 140 teens from the Diocese of St. Petersburg did two weekends ago.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Lust
Everywhere you look our culture is telling us....IS SCREAMING AT US....that sex is good and that there is nothing wrong with having sex whenever, wherever, and however we want to. In fact, our culture ENCOURAGES us to have sex whenever, wherever, and however we want to.
Everywhere you go, you see sex. You see it on the billboards as you drive down the road. You see it in the magazines in the stores, and I'm not talking about Playboy. You see talk about sex in Maxim and Cosmopolitan. You even see articles about sex in Seventeen (not that I read it!). You see it all over the internet. You see it on T.V. shows like "Sex in the City" and "Desperate Housewives". Sex is also front and center in many of the supposed "family friendly" programming that is out there. Sex is in our music and in the books we read. It's even in our schools with their sex education programs that highlight "protection" over abstinence. Sex is everywhere.
No wonder our culture struggles so much with the deadly sin of lust. When I introduced the topic of the seven deadly sins to my high school youth group and I listed the sins for them one of the responses I got was: "Lust is a sin?" This is a sad statement about the culture we live in. Lust dominates our culture so much that we can no longer recognize it as sinful.
So, then, what is lust? Lust is the disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure. It is sexual desire apart from God's love--a selfish desire to seek one's own pleasure at the expense of another. Lust is making the desire for sexual satisfaction your god, putting that desire ahead of everything else in your life.
Let's face it. We all have sexual desires. There is nothing wrong with that. In fact, our sexual desires are good. God created us. He also created in us sexual desires. But he created those desires for a specific purpose. There is a natural order to all things in life, including our sexuality.
The church teaches that sex needs to be reserved for marriage between a man and a woman for a reason. The Church is not imposing some arbitrary rule on Catholics. Look at these statistics:
I could cite more statistics about sex outside of marriage and its consequences. Sex outside of marriage is lust...plain and simple. It is indulging in your sexual desires outside of God's love--outside of God's plan for our sexuality. As you can see from the statistics, sex outside of marriage leads to pain. It leads to suffering. The Church is not just trying to push a prudish agenda. The facts support the Church's teaching.
So, what can we do? It's not like we can snap our fingers and change the culture. What we can do is change ourselves. We can live a life of modesty, as immodesty leads to lust. Both females and males play a role in being more modest, but in different ways.
Females (both teens and adults) tend to be immodest in their dress. Girls--think about it--you could be leading guys into sin by the way you dress. If you dress immodestly, you need to think about why you do so. It is possible that you dress immodestly because you like the attention you are receiving from the guys when you do so--that you feel loved by the attention you get. Maybe you don't. Maybe you dress immodestly just because it is the norm of our culture. Maybe you have never thought about how you dress. Maybe you never considered that you may be dressing immodestly. Maybe you just want to keep up with the latest fashion trends. But just because it is the norm of our culture, it doesn't make it right. To be Christian--and particularly to be Catholic--we oftentimes have to be counter-cultural.
If you girls want guys to respect you for who you are, you need to respect yourself first. You need to have the self-confidence that you can win a guy's heart with who you are as a person--mind, body, and soul--not just by the way you look. Dressing modestly tells guys that you are not an object to be lusted after. Dressing modestly demands that guys respect you for who you are.
Guys, I'm not letting you off the hook on this one. Guys can be immodest as well. Males are not so immodest in their dress, although they can be. Guys are typically more immodest in their words than they are in their dress. Guys who are immodest in their speech use abusive, sexually charged language when they are with other guys. Just walk into a male locker room, and you will hear the immodesty. They talk about the physical features of girls and what they want to do with and to them. This creates a situation of lust. Not only does the guy speaking these words start to lust after girls, but the guys hearing these words begin to lust as well.
Guys are also immodest in their words in the way they speak to girls. Guys who tell girls things they want to hear--that they are pretty, that they love them, etc.--just to take advantage of them sexually are not only being immodest in their speech, but they are also emotionally manipulating girls.
So, what are we to do? First of all, seek the Truth in all things. Understand that first of all, sex is good. Also, don't believe the lies of our culture. Our culture will tell you that having sex anywhere, anyway, and with anyone will fulfill you. Our culture tells you that lust is not a sin. Our culture is lying to you. Lust is a sin, and the pursuit of fulfilling lustful desires will not fulfill you. It will leave you wanting for more. It will leave you empty. Be bold. Be different. Dress modestly. Speak modestly. Act modestly.
Everywhere you go, you see sex. You see it on the billboards as you drive down the road. You see it in the magazines in the stores, and I'm not talking about Playboy. You see talk about sex in Maxim and Cosmopolitan. You even see articles about sex in Seventeen (not that I read it!). You see it all over the internet. You see it on T.V. shows like "Sex in the City" and "Desperate Housewives". Sex is also front and center in many of the supposed "family friendly" programming that is out there. Sex is in our music and in the books we read. It's even in our schools with their sex education programs that highlight "protection" over abstinence. Sex is everywhere.
No wonder our culture struggles so much with the deadly sin of lust. When I introduced the topic of the seven deadly sins to my high school youth group and I listed the sins for them one of the responses I got was: "Lust is a sin?" This is a sad statement about the culture we live in. Lust dominates our culture so much that we can no longer recognize it as sinful.
So, then, what is lust? Lust is the disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure. It is sexual desire apart from God's love--a selfish desire to seek one's own pleasure at the expense of another. Lust is making the desire for sexual satisfaction your god, putting that desire ahead of everything else in your life.
Let's face it. We all have sexual desires. There is nothing wrong with that. In fact, our sexual desires are good. God created us. He also created in us sexual desires. But he created those desires for a specific purpose. There is a natural order to all things in life, including our sexuality.
The church teaches that sex needs to be reserved for marriage between a man and a woman for a reason. The Church is not imposing some arbitrary rule on Catholics. Look at these statistics:
- Every day, 8,000 teenagers in the U.S. become infected by sexually transmitted diseases. This year, nearly 3 million teens will become infected.
- Overall, roughly, 1/4 of all the nations sexually active teens have been infected by a sexually transmitted disease.
- Men and women who are sexually active before marriage are more likely to get divorced.
- Teenage girls and boys who are sexually active are less likely to be happy and more likely to feel depressed.
- Teenage girls and boys who are sexually active are more likely to attempt suicide.
I could cite more statistics about sex outside of marriage and its consequences. Sex outside of marriage is lust...plain and simple. It is indulging in your sexual desires outside of God's love--outside of God's plan for our sexuality. As you can see from the statistics, sex outside of marriage leads to pain. It leads to suffering. The Church is not just trying to push a prudish agenda. The facts support the Church's teaching.
So, what can we do? It's not like we can snap our fingers and change the culture. What we can do is change ourselves. We can live a life of modesty, as immodesty leads to lust. Both females and males play a role in being more modest, but in different ways.
Females (both teens and adults) tend to be immodest in their dress. Girls--think about it--you could be leading guys into sin by the way you dress. If you dress immodestly, you need to think about why you do so. It is possible that you dress immodestly because you like the attention you are receiving from the guys when you do so--that you feel loved by the attention you get. Maybe you don't. Maybe you dress immodestly just because it is the norm of our culture. Maybe you have never thought about how you dress. Maybe you never considered that you may be dressing immodestly. Maybe you just want to keep up with the latest fashion trends. But just because it is the norm of our culture, it doesn't make it right. To be Christian--and particularly to be Catholic--we oftentimes have to be counter-cultural.
If you girls want guys to respect you for who you are, you need to respect yourself first. You need to have the self-confidence that you can win a guy's heart with who you are as a person--mind, body, and soul--not just by the way you look. Dressing modestly tells guys that you are not an object to be lusted after. Dressing modestly demands that guys respect you for who you are.
Guys, I'm not letting you off the hook on this one. Guys can be immodest as well. Males are not so immodest in their dress, although they can be. Guys are typically more immodest in their words than they are in their dress. Guys who are immodest in their speech use abusive, sexually charged language when they are with other guys. Just walk into a male locker room, and you will hear the immodesty. They talk about the physical features of girls and what they want to do with and to them. This creates a situation of lust. Not only does the guy speaking these words start to lust after girls, but the guys hearing these words begin to lust as well.
Guys are also immodest in their words in the way they speak to girls. Guys who tell girls things they want to hear--that they are pretty, that they love them, etc.--just to take advantage of them sexually are not only being immodest in their speech, but they are also emotionally manipulating girls.
So, what are we to do? First of all, seek the Truth in all things. Understand that first of all, sex is good. Also, don't believe the lies of our culture. Our culture will tell you that having sex anywhere, anyway, and with anyone will fulfill you. Our culture tells you that lust is not a sin. Our culture is lying to you. Lust is a sin, and the pursuit of fulfilling lustful desires will not fulfill you. It will leave you wanting for more. It will leave you empty. Be bold. Be different. Dress modestly. Speak modestly. Act modestly.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Sloth
I've been meaning to write this post on the next deadly sin for a while....but I've been too lazy to do it. Seriously, I'm lazy. Sloth is probably the deadly sin that I struggle with the most. I like my comfort zones, and when I'm within them, I want to stay there. I don't want to be challenged. I don't want to have to work hard. I want to just ask the question, "What is the least I can do and survive?" Sometimes I'm so lazy that I want to go out and buy products like this...
So, what is this sin of sloth, and what is so wrong with it? Laziness comes in two forms. First of all, laziness is not wanting to do anything...just sitting around like a lump all day, doing nothing. The second form of laziness is doing what you want to do instead of doing what you should do.
Why is laziness a sin? It is a sin on a number of different levels. First of all, God has given us specific gifts and talents. He wants us to work hard and to put to use those gifts and talents. Laziness prevents us from using those gifts.
God also wants us to help others. He wants us to get outside of our comfort zones and feed the hungry, clothe the naked, shelter the homeless. He wants us to reach out to those who are suffering physically and emotionally. Laziness prevents us from doing this.
Finally, God wants us to pray, to grow spiritually. But many of us don't. We don't take the time each day to thank God for the gifts He has given us. We don't ask Him for guidance in our lives. Spiritual laziness, this spiritual indifference, I believe, is the root cause for laziness in all other aspects in our lives. It festers and grows and permeates our whole being. Without a disciplined spiritual life, we cannot know God's will for our lives. We have no direction without prayer. Without any direction, without knowing what God wants us to do, then we all have a tendency to do nothing, and that breeds laziness.
I've seen this in my own life. When I set goals for me in my life, when I try to be disciplined in my spiritual life, I tend to be more disciplined in my work life and in my family life. However, my life is like a yo-yo. I can go weeks, even months at a time where I am spiritually disciplined. Life is good during those times. I get a lot more accomplished at work, I get a lot more accomplished at home. I am, overall, a happier person.
The problem, however, is that I can never get that discipline to last. Eventually, my natural inclination to laziness begins to set in. And once it takes over, I'm dead. I'm unfocused at work and at home. I lose my sense of purpose in life. I lose my passion, my ambition.
My whole life, our whole lives, hinge on our spiritual lives. If we have no passion our faith, if we have no discipline, no zeal for our spiritual lives, then we will have no discipline or zeal in other areas of our lives either.
So, what is the antidote? Diligence. If you struggle with laziness like I do, be diligent! Realize that the only way you can overcome your struggle with laziness is to be focused and disciplined in your spiritual life.
In the bible, no one interacts with God without being given a mission---without being sent out into the world with a job to do. We have all been made with a definite purpose, a goal that God has created for us. Only you can carry out the goal God has created for you. Discern your mission. Pray. Ask God what you can do for Him. Read the scriptures. Go to Mass. There are 168 hours in a week. If you can't give God 1 hour to go to Mass, then you will never overcome laziness.
So, what is this sin of sloth, and what is so wrong with it? Laziness comes in two forms. First of all, laziness is not wanting to do anything...just sitting around like a lump all day, doing nothing. The second form of laziness is doing what you want to do instead of doing what you should do.
Why is laziness a sin? It is a sin on a number of different levels. First of all, God has given us specific gifts and talents. He wants us to work hard and to put to use those gifts and talents. Laziness prevents us from using those gifts.
God also wants us to help others. He wants us to get outside of our comfort zones and feed the hungry, clothe the naked, shelter the homeless. He wants us to reach out to those who are suffering physically and emotionally. Laziness prevents us from doing this.
Finally, God wants us to pray, to grow spiritually. But many of us don't. We don't take the time each day to thank God for the gifts He has given us. We don't ask Him for guidance in our lives. Spiritual laziness, this spiritual indifference, I believe, is the root cause for laziness in all other aspects in our lives. It festers and grows and permeates our whole being. Without a disciplined spiritual life, we cannot know God's will for our lives. We have no direction without prayer. Without any direction, without knowing what God wants us to do, then we all have a tendency to do nothing, and that breeds laziness.
I've seen this in my own life. When I set goals for me in my life, when I try to be disciplined in my spiritual life, I tend to be more disciplined in my work life and in my family life. However, my life is like a yo-yo. I can go weeks, even months at a time where I am spiritually disciplined. Life is good during those times. I get a lot more accomplished at work, I get a lot more accomplished at home. I am, overall, a happier person.
The problem, however, is that I can never get that discipline to last. Eventually, my natural inclination to laziness begins to set in. And once it takes over, I'm dead. I'm unfocused at work and at home. I lose my sense of purpose in life. I lose my passion, my ambition.
My whole life, our whole lives, hinge on our spiritual lives. If we have no passion our faith, if we have no discipline, no zeal for our spiritual lives, then we will have no discipline or zeal in other areas of our lives either.
So, what is the antidote? Diligence. If you struggle with laziness like I do, be diligent! Realize that the only way you can overcome your struggle with laziness is to be focused and disciplined in your spiritual life.
In the bible, no one interacts with God without being given a mission---without being sent out into the world with a job to do. We have all been made with a definite purpose, a goal that God has created for us. Only you can carry out the goal God has created for you. Discern your mission. Pray. Ask God what you can do for Him. Read the scriptures. Go to Mass. There are 168 hours in a week. If you can't give God 1 hour to go to Mass, then you will never overcome laziness.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
The Uninvited Guest
What would you do if a complete stranger came up to you and invited himself to dinner at your house? How would you react? I know that my reaction would not be a favorable one. First of all, I would respond with something like...."What? Are you nuts? You can't come to my house! Go away!" If he continued to push the issue with me I would continue to say no, citing that my house isn't ready to receive guests....that there are dirty dishes in the sink, the kids toys are strewn all over the house. I just can't invite someone into a dirty house.
Yet, that is just what Jesus did with Zacchaeus. Jesus saw Zacchaeus sitting up in the tree, told him to come down from the tree, and then proceeded to invite himself over to Zacchaeus' house for dinner.(Luke 19:1-10). Zacchaeus, however, did not react the way I would have if someone invited himself to my house. Zacchaeus "came down and quickly received him with joy". Not only did Zacchaeus not have an adverse reaction to Jesus' invitation, but Zacchaeus received Jesus with joy.
Jesus is inviting Himself into my life--into all of our lives. Yes, oftentimes He comes as an uninvited guest. How often do I outright reject Jesus' invitation? How often do I say that Jesus' invitation is just plain crazy and send Him away? How often do I make excuses, saying that I am a sinner and unworthy of his welcome? Yet, there He is, inviting Himself into my life every day. I wake up each morning with Jesus calling to me, inviting Himself into my life. Oftentimes I just ignore Him. Sometimes I tell Him to go away or say that my life is too messy.
On those occasions that I do allow Jesus into my life, that I do accept His invitation to enter in, I receive graces and blessings beyond all that I can imagine. It makes me wonder why I don't invite Him in more often.
Jesus, today, I invite you into my life. My life is dirty. It's filthy, really. And yet, despite my shortcomings, despite my sin, I invite you in. Come Lord, into my life, for you have "come to seek and save the lost."
Yet, that is just what Jesus did with Zacchaeus. Jesus saw Zacchaeus sitting up in the tree, told him to come down from the tree, and then proceeded to invite himself over to Zacchaeus' house for dinner.(Luke 19:1-10). Zacchaeus, however, did not react the way I would have if someone invited himself to my house. Zacchaeus "came down and quickly received him with joy". Not only did Zacchaeus not have an adverse reaction to Jesus' invitation, but Zacchaeus received Jesus with joy.
Jesus is inviting Himself into my life--into all of our lives. Yes, oftentimes He comes as an uninvited guest. How often do I outright reject Jesus' invitation? How often do I say that Jesus' invitation is just plain crazy and send Him away? How often do I make excuses, saying that I am a sinner and unworthy of his welcome? Yet, there He is, inviting Himself into my life every day. I wake up each morning with Jesus calling to me, inviting Himself into my life. Oftentimes I just ignore Him. Sometimes I tell Him to go away or say that my life is too messy.
On those occasions that I do allow Jesus into my life, that I do accept His invitation to enter in, I receive graces and blessings beyond all that I can imagine. It makes me wonder why I don't invite Him in more often.
Jesus, today, I invite you into my life. My life is dirty. It's filthy, really. And yet, despite my shortcomings, despite my sin, I invite you in. Come Lord, into my life, for you have "come to seek and save the lost."
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Gluttony
Gluttony is the immoderate, unreasonable pleasure in food and drink, and it is a sin. The Catholic Church is not Puritanistic in saying that we cannot enjoy food and drink. There is nothing wrong with taking pleasure in eating and drinking. However, when making the desire for food and drink the center of your life, then you cross into gluttony.
Gluttony is not just a sin that only overweight people commit. We all have the ability to be gluttonous. If you were to look at me, your first thought would not be that I'm gluttonous. I'm tall and skinny. I certainly don't look like I over-eat. However, I do have a tendency to be gluttonous at times. I've just been blessed with a high metabolism. My gluttony manifests itself through my sweet tooth. When I start eating sweets, I oftentimes find that I cannot stop. I just want to keep eating more.
Do you eat to make yourself feel better? I'm not talking about relieving physical hunger pangs. Do you eat to feel happy? If you eat or drink to make yourself feel better then you may be committing the sin of gluttony.
We all have a desire for happiness. Gluttony is seeking that happiness in food and drink. The problem we run into when we seek food and drink to satisfy our happiness is that, although we may satisfy that emotional need temporarily, it does not make us truly happy. So, we eat and drink more. And we eventually become addicted to food and drink. We need it to make ourselves feel better--to make us feel happy.
What's the antidote for gluttony? What's the opposite virtue? Temperance. Temperance is moderation, self-restraint. Discipline is a very important aspect of obtaining happiness. We need to have discipline over our desire to eat and drink. We need to understand that over-indulging in food and drink has a negative impact on our bodies and our souls. We need to make God the center of our lives instead of food and drink.
Gluttony is not just a sin that only overweight people commit. We all have the ability to be gluttonous. If you were to look at me, your first thought would not be that I'm gluttonous. I'm tall and skinny. I certainly don't look like I over-eat. However, I do have a tendency to be gluttonous at times. I've just been blessed with a high metabolism. My gluttony manifests itself through my sweet tooth. When I start eating sweets, I oftentimes find that I cannot stop. I just want to keep eating more.
Do you eat to make yourself feel better? I'm not talking about relieving physical hunger pangs. Do you eat to feel happy? If you eat or drink to make yourself feel better then you may be committing the sin of gluttony.
We all have a desire for happiness. Gluttony is seeking that happiness in food and drink. The problem we run into when we seek food and drink to satisfy our happiness is that, although we may satisfy that emotional need temporarily, it does not make us truly happy. So, we eat and drink more. And we eventually become addicted to food and drink. We need it to make ourselves feel better--to make us feel happy.
What's the antidote for gluttony? What's the opposite virtue? Temperance. Temperance is moderation, self-restraint. Discipline is a very important aspect of obtaining happiness. We need to have discipline over our desire to eat and drink. We need to understand that over-indulging in food and drink has a negative impact on our bodies and our souls. We need to make God the center of our lives instead of food and drink.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Defining Moment
I have had many defining moments in my life. It’s hard to pick just one. My marriage was certainly a defining moment. The birth of my first child was also a defining moment. But I think that one of the most significant defining moments in my life was my decision to leave the seminary because it impacted the other defining moments in my life.
Entering the seminary, for me, was not a defining moment. It just seemed like the next logical step for me in my life. Discerning to leave the seminary was extremely difficult for me. I was afraid that I was going to disappoint my parents. I was afraid I was going to disappoint my classmates and the seminary directors. I was afraid I was going to disappoint God.
In the end, I saw that God was calling me to leave the seminary. It was a defining moment because it laid the ground work for the rest of my life. It was also a defining moment because, for the first time in my life, I realized that I could actually hear the voice of God speaking to me. Not an audible voice coming down from heaven, but a whisper in the silence of my heart.
I think it is important for all of us to recognize the defining moments in our lives, for it is in those defining moments that we all can see the work of God in our lives. God was at work in my life. I was unable to see it then, but because of my decision to leave the seminary I now have a wonderful wife and 5 beautiful children. Because of that defining moment, I now have a deeper relationship with our Lord, a more personal relationship.
What are the defining moments in your life? Discover them, and you will discover God.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Things to reflect on....
I am in the midst of the formal discernment process for the permanent diaconate in the Diocese of St. Petersburg, Fl. The process here in my diocese consists of 6 bi-weekly meetings to help us men discern God's will for us. I've attended two meetings thus far, and am looking forward to the rest of the meetings. We've been given "homework". After the first meeting, we were all asked to reflect on the following questions:
I want to take a moment to reflect on the second question now: How do you personally define discernment?
Discernment is a process. It is not so much a process of decision making as it is a process of understanding. That process, that search for understanding, involves input from those directly involved in the thing being discerned (i.e. family and friends), from God through prayer, and, in the case of life's vocation (priesthood, diaconate, and marriage), it requires input from the Church.
There are many competing voices that we must contend with in the discernment process. Take, for example, the process of getting engaged and married. When a couple discerns marriage they will get advice and comments from others about that discernment. Whether it be for good or bad, everyone will give the newly engaged couple advice and their opinion on just about everything. In discerning whether or not you are with the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you have to sort through all of those external voices from others and take into consideration the good, the bad, and the ugly when it comes to getting married.
The second voice we must contend with in the discernment process is that internal voice. This is the voice of doubt, the voice of joy, the voice of confidence, the voice of fear, and the many other voices we hear within our heads. Some of those voices are good, they are from God. Other voices are the voices of the evil one trying to get us to make the wrong decision in the thing that we are discerning. We need to pray about and sort through these voices to truly find where God is guiding us.
The third voice of discernment is the voice of the Church. This voice is particularly apparent in vocations to the priesthood, diaconate, and religious life because those vocations are connected directly to the Church. Not as apparent, but still present, is the voice of the Church in discerning the vocation to marriage. The Church should play a role in helping an engaged couple discern their marriage through the sacramental preparation process that they go through. Regardless of your life's vocation, the Church has an important role to play. We must listen to the wisdom and guidance of the Church in discerning our life's vocation.
At the center of all of this discernment process there should be prayer. We need to take the advice of others, the competing voices in our heads, and the guidance of the Church to prayer. We must be willing quiet our minds and to all the other voices and to listen to the will of God.
God calls each of us to a vocation. Discernment is the process that we must go through to understand what God is calling us to. In order to properly discern God's vocation we must be willing to seek the input of our family and friends, of the Church, and of God Himself though our spiritual life. God has a plan for us. We need to go through this discernment process to understand God's plan.
I will write later about the third question.
What is spirituality?All three questions are relevant not only to us men discerning the permanent diaconate, but to all of us. So, being the blog addict that I am, I will write about all three of these questions for all of cyberspace to see. The first question, "What is spirituality?" will appear on Catholic Dads as a part of my regular weekly series on A Father's Faith. You can check it out here.
How do you personally define discernment?
Give an example of a defining moment and why it was a defining moment.
I want to take a moment to reflect on the second question now: How do you personally define discernment?
Discernment is a process. It is not so much a process of decision making as it is a process of understanding. That process, that search for understanding, involves input from those directly involved in the thing being discerned (i.e. family and friends), from God through prayer, and, in the case of life's vocation (priesthood, diaconate, and marriage), it requires input from the Church.
There are many competing voices that we must contend with in the discernment process. Take, for example, the process of getting engaged and married. When a couple discerns marriage they will get advice and comments from others about that discernment. Whether it be for good or bad, everyone will give the newly engaged couple advice and their opinion on just about everything. In discerning whether or not you are with the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you have to sort through all of those external voices from others and take into consideration the good, the bad, and the ugly when it comes to getting married.
The second voice we must contend with in the discernment process is that internal voice. This is the voice of doubt, the voice of joy, the voice of confidence, the voice of fear, and the many other voices we hear within our heads. Some of those voices are good, they are from God. Other voices are the voices of the evil one trying to get us to make the wrong decision in the thing that we are discerning. We need to pray about and sort through these voices to truly find where God is guiding us.
The third voice of discernment is the voice of the Church. This voice is particularly apparent in vocations to the priesthood, diaconate, and religious life because those vocations are connected directly to the Church. Not as apparent, but still present, is the voice of the Church in discerning the vocation to marriage. The Church should play a role in helping an engaged couple discern their marriage through the sacramental preparation process that they go through. Regardless of your life's vocation, the Church has an important role to play. We must listen to the wisdom and guidance of the Church in discerning our life's vocation.
At the center of all of this discernment process there should be prayer. We need to take the advice of others, the competing voices in our heads, and the guidance of the Church to prayer. We must be willing quiet our minds and to all the other voices and to listen to the will of God.
God calls each of us to a vocation. Discernment is the process that we must go through to understand what God is calling us to. In order to properly discern God's vocation we must be willing to seek the input of our family and friends, of the Church, and of God Himself though our spiritual life. God has a plan for us. We need to go through this discernment process to understand God's plan.
I will write later about the third question.
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